What is chronic pain? How does it affect me? And will it ever go away...
The true definition
"Chronic Pain is pain (an unpleasant sense of discomfort) that persists or progresses over a long period of time. In contrast to acute pain that arises suddenly in response to specific injury and is usually treatable, chronic pain persists over time and is usually resistant to most treatment"
Aka: Chronic pain is not very nice for anyone!
But what does it actually mean for people?
Chronic pain is just a general term that can mean a hundred things depending on who you ask. There are many conditions that can cause various degrees and forms of chronic pain, such as... -Cancers -Fibromyalgia -Arthiritis -Sciatica -Diabetes -Chronic Pain Syndrome
In truth this list is endless and could go on for a 1000 pages before even touching the surface. To put it bluntly, 1 in every 5 people suffer from some form of chronic pain, and that is a lot of people!
The pain and discomfort experienced by an individual really depends on who you are. Some people will say it is more of a dull pain, whereas others are in such bad pain they cannot walk or stand unaided. It is as if 'chronic pain' is just an umbrella term given to an ocean of issues that no one can pinpoint a cause to. And as always the biggest problem is that it cannot be seen...
Hidden in the sea of Invisibility
Being hidden is a huge problem in getting help for your chronic pain! Chronic pain does not always show up in test results or even have a definitive cause. It is something that is simply there and you either deal with it or you crumble. Even doctors do not always believe the extent of your pain sometimes, and those closest to you may also not realise what you are going through. The reality is that you begin to get used to the pain as a constant in your life, so people assume it can't be 'that bad'. This is not the case!
The reason we get 'used' to the pain is not because it doesn't hurt enough for us to feel it, in fact it isn't because we have gotten 'used' to it at all. It is because we know we HAVE to deal with it, and we can either do that with tears or a smile. Either way it will be our daily life.
Hiding your illness has become commonplace in our society. No one wants to employ the cripple. No one wants to be friends with the 'insane' or have to 'babysit' the disabled. Within that distancing we have lost human empathy for one another. People judge eachother now, based on the invisible pain we feel.
If no one believes you, there isn't anything much you can do besides grin and bare it.
What else can it cause?
Chronic pain is not just pain. It is...
-Countless sleepless nights, spent awake until 4am trying to distract yourself. -Constant tiredness and exhaustion in our bodies. -Relentless discomfort, which just as you think is going away, comes back full force. -Irritability (because no sleep=no filter) -Anxiety because you worry about doing things in fear of pain. -Distancing yourself from others to 'protect' yourself -Depression (no one would like to feel this way :() -Loss of interest in things you enjoy (you just don't have the energy) -Pain in your joints, muscles, nerves, it could be everywhere!
Chronic pain can be awful and is really no joke :( If you know someone in chronic pain, please reach out to them! They may be tired, push you away or make excuses but every little step they make counts! <3
My Chronic Pain Story...
Why?
I do not know why I usually feel constant pain. For me my pain changes often. Some days I can cope with it easily and it is just like a dull and mild discomfort, but other days it has me crying. Luckily these bad days are a lot more rare, but I am never totally pain free. (which sucks!)
What do I feel?
To explain pain is one of the most impossible things! It is like trying to explain why the earth exists or what love feels like. The problem is that my pain changes constantly, so if I am not at my worst I simply cannot describe what the worst feels like (until I am feeling it) and vice versa. Right now I have quite a lot of pain in my lower back, which I have had for over a week now (it began dull and gets more severe as the day goes on). That pain is more of a stabbing, which is super annoying, but my usual pain tends to feel more warm and like a burning sensation. I also get pins and needles every day which I hate! But at least they aren't real pins and needles in my body!
What support do I have?
Callum is amazing and I could never ask for a better partner! He knows what I go through, and helps me wherever he can (might do another blog post on this later)
My mum on the other hand, does not always see how badly the pain affects me. She sometimes gets annoyed that I occasionally hire wheelchairs when I know I will have to travel far in one day. She says I am 'too young' which is very true, I hate being in one. But it is not me being lazy. It is simply because I am afraid to over-do myself and end up in 10 times worse pain for the week after!! I do not ever blame people for not understanding me or my pain. You cannot see my pain, or my conditions. There is a piece of paper with a diagnosis which to anyone besides me would mean nothing. They cannot feel it or understand, but that is not their fault. To anyone else experiencing people not understanding, please just remember that they cannot feel what you feel. They do not mean to be offensive, they just don't have the experience to understand it fully.
What side effects does it cause?
I AM ALWAYS TIRED!! This is a mix of insomnia (I am usually in too much pain at night to fall asleep, and I have very broken sleep as I wake up in discomfort a lot of the time) and my medication! I take gabapentin to control my pain (sadly it doesn't work at fixing it, but it takes a very small amount of the edge off!) Gabapentin is well known for making you very very tired. I most certainly cannot sleep like a baby! Some days my family and friends think I am lazy because I like to take naps in the evening or wake up later in the day. This is purely because I have constantly got a nasty feeling that hinders how well I sleep at night. If I am comfortable enough to sleep, I would be a fool to not try to take the nap! And I hate waking up before my body thinks it is ready too, because every minute of sleep I get helps to combat my tiredness! Not only do I get tired, I also get very anxious. I find myself constantly putting things into place to bubblewrap myself from the world. Whether that is hiring a wheelchair on days out that would involve lots of walking, or simply avoiding activities, I never do anything that I worry could cause me pain. This has hindered me from doing quite a lot, but I hope writing this blog will help me come out of my shell a bit and have more fun! :)
This blog post is now getting super long like all the others! Before your eyes fall out from the light of your phone or computer screen, I will end this post! I am planning on following this up with another post later, so I will leave the rest until then! <3
See you soon,
Tasha
I have the same disease as you